Basic Needs
All humans have basic needs, such as friendship, respect, security, love, and acceptance.
Conflict arises from differences. When a conflict triggers strong feelings, a deep personal need is at the core of the problem.
Here are some examples of needs:
- To feel safe and secure
- To feel respected and valued
- To have more closeness and intimacy
A need does not go away when ignored, so it is important to address a conflict when it comes up. When you ignore a conflict, it causes frustration, anger, and tension in a relationship. When you resolve a conflict, it builds trust.
It is important to acknowledge that each person involved in a conflict has valid needs. You might not share their values, motivation, perceptions, ideas, or desire. But when you understand what is important to someone else, it will help resolve your conflict.